Tuchel’s Tough Love for Flying Phil…
It seems that in the world of football, Phil Foden’s dance card is all filled up with awkward moves. Thomas Tuchel, England’s new football head honcho, didn’t even wait for the second date before he took to the mic and had a chat about Man City’s frenetic winger. Taking over from Gareth Southgate like a stern school principal erasing the old chalkboard, Tuchel had his say on why Foden and his buddy Marcus Rashford didn’t quite smash it in Wembley against Albania.
Tuchel’s strategy was clear: both wings, more dribbling, less knitting circle passing. Except the boys had performance anxiety. “Where was the razzle-dazzle from club football?” wondered Tuchel, likely looking for more salsa in their samba. Despite Foden’s own preference to twist and twirl on the right, his attempts were as flat as a pancake that forgot to rise.
Even Roy Keane tuned into the show, delivering his classic Keane-isms about Foden’s current form being as cheerful as a wet January. With more bluntness than a plastic knife, he declared, “Phil might need a new map; the route to goal seems quite lost!”
England’s fingers are crossed for a less philosophical match against Latvia. Meanwhile, Foden’s dance moves better get snappy before Pep and his City slickers strive to polish a season gone dull.
