Etihad’s Walking Wounded: Man City vs. Aston Villa…
Ah, Manchester City, the titans of the Etihad, victoriously trumped Everton 2-0 in a game that had fans biting their nails down to the nub! While Pep’s gang danced to victory like salsa champions at Goodison Park, there are bones and joints creaking louder than Michael Jackson’s Thriller! Yes, folks, half of City’s A-Team is nursing injuries, and it’s like seeing a herd of turtles trying to cross a busy motorway. Hold tight, folks, injuries incoming!
The Mystery Keeper, Ederson, is currently playing hide-and-seek with fitness. After being subbed off faster than a toddler refusing vegetables, his return date is as confusing as the offside rule! Meanwhile, Haaland – bless his Nordic socks – has rolled his ankle in epic quest style against Bournemouth. Rumor has it he’s building a new super-ankle in his secret lair! His expected return? Possibly May, as he duels ankle-demons and bench shadows.
And Stones – our valiant defender – pulled the plug after a mere eight minutes against the might of Real Madrid. He’s set for a comeback sooner than later, with Pep reporting a recovery faster than a football fan at an all-you-can-eat nachos night! City’s got a revolving door of injuries but fret not – there are plenty of camels in the desert, and players in the bench!
